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Game Recaps

Falcons Blow 25 Point Lead in Superbowl!

Atlanta Falcons really showed their inexperience last night when they blew a 25 point lead in the 4th quarter to lose to the New England Patriots. Tom Brady couldn’t ask for a better comeback winning situation.
The Atlanta Falcons are definitely new to this thang they call the Superbowl

Ravens Lose 28 to 24 Despite Great Performance by Steve Smith Sr.

Terrell Suggs will be out for the 2015 NFL Season

Patriots Beat Seahawks in Superbowl

The Seahawks made one of the dumbest calls in Superbowl history on the goal line. They decided to throw the ball in middle rather than hand off to Beast Mode (Marshaun Lynch) and let him run it in with ease. This was a dumb ass risky move and Seattle paid the price for it.

Now we gotta listen to bullshit talk of how great Tom Brady is and listen to the media praise those cheating ass Patriots. Oh well, I hope the Ravens get their asses next year!

Ravens vs Bengals Poem

Ravens vs Bengals Game on 10/26/14

I had such high hopes going in
that the Ravens would go on the road and get the win
A divisional game so it’s time to play like studs
But it was the Bengals who drew first blood
And even though 6 points in the red zone is enough to tempt me.
We did the same sh_t the 1st game and came up empty
It was early in the game and we were not needy
Plus we have Legatron so why be greedy?
Then Flacco got picked off again and I felt the shame
So I cracked another beer just to ease the pain
But just when it looked like it wasn’t our day
Big Haloti Ngata made a hell of a play!
It wasn’t enough though so maybe we didn’t deserve this
I knew those 3 points we did not get early would come back to hurt us
They called Steven Smith’s TD back. Man those reps suck!
We lost 27 to 24 and all I can say is what the f_ck
(c) 2014

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Ravens vs Falcons Poem

Ravens vs Falcons Game on 10/19/14

The Falcons have some decent weapons on their roster
But no weapons formed against our team shall prosper
It’s close to Halloween but there was nothing to fear
And the first TD to Owen Daniels kinda made that clear
Even before that score I never really had a doubt
Kicking ass at home is what this team is about
And even though Flacco threw a couple interceptions
The way the Ravens defense played, we didn’t need perfection
And I am sorry to have to bust our opponent’s bubble
But when Torrey Smith gets hot, u know u in trouble
In our house the Ravens are the only birds that fly
I did not see one Falcon up in the sky
They come to Baltimore happy and go back home crying
Just ask the whole Falcons team if u think I am lying
No mas! No mas! They don’t want no more!
29 to 7 was the final score
(c) 2014

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Ravens vs Bucs Poem

Ravens vs Bucs Game on 10/12/14

I told my girlfriend to leave me alone so I can watch this massacre
No interruptions on Sunday is all that I ask of her
So I went down to the man cave to get some peace
and to watch Joe Flacco play like a beast!
The Ravens offense moved the ball down the field with ease
Torrey Smith set the tone with the first 2 TDs
I knew we would go down to Tampa and kick some asses
But I didn’t expect Flacco to throw 5 TD passes!
And with Forsett running the ball so nice
I totally forgot all about Ray Rice
Sorry Bucs fans but I just had to laugh
This game was over before the end of the first half.
The Ravens players who played barely broke a sweat
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48 to 17 was the final score
Yeah today was a good day for Baltimore
(c) 2014

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Ravens vs Colts Poem

Ravens vs Colts Game on 10/5/14

Turnover after turnover what the F__k
Did a few of our players get paid off by Luck?
All of of a sudden our O-line giving up the sacks
I was getting tired of seeing Flacco on his back
The defense played their asses off without a doubt
The offense well they kept going 3 and out
Run the ball more! When will Ravens learn that lesson?
Doesn’t anybody value time of possession?
Did Steve Smith play? If so he was quiet and humble
Oh yeah I remember now, he was the first one to fumble
But I can’t diss him because he is my favorite player
I mean just last week I would have elected him mayor
And for the 40 and over fans reading this doesn’t it seem
kinda strange to get beaten by your former team? remembers Irsay and those Mayflower trucks
The bright side is next week we get to play those scrubby Bucs
(c) 2014

Steve Smith Sr. – I Call Him Stiff Armatron

If Ravens kicker Justin Tucker is Legatron then wide reveiver Steve Smith Sr. must be Stiff Armatron! Steve Smith uses the stiff arm better than most running backs and he is a small wide receiver. Don’t let his size fool you though because he is a Lil Bully that bullies the other teams secondary week after week.

I knew Steve Smith Sr. would have a great day against his former team the Carolina Panthers. Not only did he win me some money in my fantasy football league, but he also led the Ravens to an incredible victory by setting the tone early. Smith ended up with 2 amazing touchdown catches and 139 yards receiving. Smith also became the oldest player in NFL history to have 400 yards in his first 4 games playing for a team.

Well I guess if the Steelers crushed the Panthers and the Ravens crushed the Steelers then it is only logical that the Ravens would crush the Panthers.

The Baltimore Ravens are now undefeated in Steve Smith Bowls, Harbowls, and Superbowls!!! LOL Go Ravens!!!

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Ravens Shatter Hopes and Dreams of Cleveland Browns

I’m sorry Cleveland Browns fans, but the Baltimore Ravens own yall asses!  LOL   In spite of  all the distractions with the Ray Rice scandal and the fact that the Browns were playing at home they still could not defeat the Baltimore Ravens!  The Ravens continue to dominate the Browns as the Ravens defeated them once again in their own house.  That right!  The Ravens went into hostile territory and came away with another victory.  Yes, the Ravens kicked the Browns asses in their own house!

Okay, I won’t brag too much because it was a close game, but we have the better field goal kicker.  We have Justin Tucker and the Browns have our exiled reject Billy Cundiff for a kicker.  This was the difference as Justin Tucker kicked the winning field goal for the Ravens.  Billy Cundiff on the other hand, missed a field goal for the Browns and also had a kick blocked.  That turned out to be the difference in this closely fought game.

The good news for Ravens fans is that we beat the Brown once again by a score of 23 to 21.  Rookie Running Back Lorenzo Taliaferro got his first start and took advantage of it by rushing for 91 yards and a TD. Steve Smith Sr. had 101 yards receiving in the game and is turning into our #1 clutch wide receiver. There was some bad news for the Ravens fans though as TE Dennis Pitta was injured and sidelined during the game.

There is nothing but bad news for Cleveland Browns fans. The Ravens shattered the hopes and dreams of the Cleveland Browns once again. This was an opportunity for the Browns to prove they belong in the AFC North but they still have to bow down to the Purple and Black bullies.

Go Ravens!!!